Thursday, September 15, 2011

It's enough to make a grown man cry

I have a new enemy. It's the new barre.

Our instructor has been threatening us with barre stretches when the new barre arrived for months. Now that it's here, she's making good on those threats.

I'm not sure she really understood when I said we had to lower one side almost all the way down for me to be able to do it. Even the shortest women could put their legs on the higher side, bend at the waist, and touch their feet with their hands. With the barre on my side about a foot lower I can almost place my foot on the barre from a développé -- the last little bit needs some assistance -- and stand there with hips just about level. Attempting to bend toward my foot shifts my hamstring from a guitar low-E pitch to a violin E screech. Sliding down the barre just spreads the tension down the standing leg.

Ow. Not fun. The women just looked at me like they couldn't understand not being able to do this simple stretch. Welcome to biological gender differences 101.

I think I'm going to hobble off to bed now.

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